I suppose I began writing this blog to tell a love story, or to speak about how wonderful college is, but if you read this blog then you should know better.

For a while it felt as though nothing was going right in my life. I was making a lot of poor decisions, as well as befriending a lot of people that were aiding in my awful decisions. But then I realized something today, as I sat in a coffee shop with a new friend. My problem was loyalty. I feel as though this generation has begun to feel so self entitled that they never see when they do something wrong, and there for never apologize for anything.

How hard is it to be there for a friend when they need you? How hard is it to try to understand where that person is coming from especially if you call each other friends? This shouldn’t even be a question. If you love someone you should be loyal to them.

And I know that at this moment I am calling the kettle black, because I have been disloyal at times, but I still understand how to fix it. When you have done something wrong, such as betraying a friend or a lover the first thing you should do is confide in that person, and ask for forgiveness.

That person doesn’t have to forgive you, but this process should still begin after you have broken the trust. But no, thats not what I have been dealing with. I decided that after being lied to, used, and being treated as though I had no idea what was happening around me, that I am done.

I will no longer sit and listen to bitchying, and crying about drama I have no idea about. I will no longer be “loaning” money out, driving people home, cooking anyone dinner, nothing. The one person that I trust right now is my family, and my girlfriend, and if anyone wants to join that tight circle they are going to need to prove to me that they are worth it.

I guess the lesson I’m trying to teach is that you shouldn’t let people run all over you just because you’re afraid of losing friends. Because I see now that it is better to have no friends, then friends who care zero percent about you.

Much Love,

CSMĀ loyalty2


The Changing of Seasons

I will say when I left for college, I never stopped to think about all the things that were going to change. I was no longer required to go home at midnight by my mom, I was going to be moving to a different city, and trying to graduate on time, and hopefully having a social life. Now that spring semester is over summer has finally returned, and it feel as though the air is lighter.

It is one of my favorite times of the year, even though I still have to work, and take summer classes it is always a very relaxed time. After my… I would go with interesting spring semester, I am happy to say everything has calmed down. I was offered many different opportunities to better my schooling, and work life, but I have also been working on myself a lot.

Working on myself included becoming a yogi as some call it, but to me its just relaxing life. Once or twice a week you’ll be able to find me on a mat giving and receiving energy. I have also been cutting out people from my life that have been doing nothing but bring me down. Its never okay to let people walk all over you, even if they don’t realize what they are doing themselves.

I was able to get an internship with an amazing organization, as well as pass all of my classes. I know that with the changing of seasons always reminds me that each change brings me one step closer to living. I feel as though when you’re in college you’re living in an isolated life. Rules do not apply to you, which is why college kids seem to always be getting into trouble. Your biggest responsibility is still school, and for some work. It’s a holding ground that helps shape people for the real world.

What I’m trying to say is, I can feel everything changing back into peaceful times, and I hope it stays. I have been having a very interesting time in college, I’ve meet people who have lied to me, used me, and worse. But there is always hope for better times, especially with changing times.


Much Love,